East Hollywood Blues

A Diary Of Life Among Millennials

Month: November 2017

The New Rolling Pin

Two hipsters of unknown but relatively recent vintage wearing beards that would impress your average Hasid were discussing online dating next to me on the train as I made my way to work in the Steakhouse.

Hipster #1 – So I told my boss I needed Saturday nights off so I could meet girls.

Hipster #2 – You don’t need to take a day off. You need to play World of Warcraft dog.

Hipster #1 – Really.

Hipster #2 – Really dude. That’s how I met my chick. We just started talking then I decided to drive to West Virginia to get her. I got there and was like ‘bitch you’re with me now.’

Hipster #1 – And now she’s in L.A. dog.

Hipster #2 – She lives in my room dude.

World of Warcraft is the new rolling pin.

Rememberence Of Things Past Without Any Rythym

There is no more Mexican Polka in the building across the alley. No more being woken up at 6:05am with the music ending at 6:38am. No. Now there is a 23 year old Millennial/hipster complete with ironic Merle Olsen beard using a typewriter, IBM Selectric or so it sounds, to write his memoirs between 1:30am and whenever the fuck he realizes he is an uninteresting prick – usually around 5am.

Where is Proust when you need him to do wet work for you?